Mark Saturno
— David Sleet
Steven Zachary Parker
— Narrator
Scott Rowe
— Scantily-Clad Old-Timer
Reiko Guerin
— Gangsta Lady
Eddie Morrison
— Police Officer
Shabana Azeez
— Shop Woman #1
Emma Bargery
— Shop Woman #2
Louise McCabe
— Beaked Lady
Kate Bonney
— Simone
Hjálmar Marteinsson
— Snazzy Gorilla
Kelly Joy McNamara
— Panda
Tom Cornwall
— Stressed Out Man
Rick Mills
— Evil Guy