Craig Ferguson
— Crawford Mackenzie
Frances Fisher
— Candy
Mary McCormack
— Monique
Donal Logue
— Eamonn
Larry Miller
— Dunston Cactus
Charles Napier
— Sen. Warren Crockett
Michael Paul Chan
— Clarence
Sara Gilbert
— Gretle Dickens
Ted McGinley
— Johnny Darjerling
Nina Siemaszko
— Betty Fuego
David Rasche
— Stig
Chris Langham
— BBC Interviewer
David Hasselhoff
— David Hasselhoff
Drew Carey
— Drew Carey
Cathy Lee Crosby
— Cathy Lee Crosby
Caitlyn Jenner
— Bruce Jenner
Melissa Rivers
— Dianne Abbott
Cynthia Basinet
— Hotel Clerk
Emily Procter
— Young Valhenna Woman
Jay Thomas
— Tony Bolero (uncredited)
Isabella Aitken
— Mrs. Beasie Mackenzie
Kevin Allen
— Gareth Trundle
Angela McCluskey
— Senga Magoogan
Francine York
— Elegant Woman
Norm Compton
— Cop Driver
Loren Lazerine
— Bear Suit Person
Robert Fisher
— Bunny Suit Person
Steven M. Porter
— Chicken Suit Person
Evie Peck
— Reindeer Suit Person
Robert Sherman
— Constance