Chris Elliott
— Chris
Chance Bassett
— Cindy
Jimmy Butts
— No Brain
Eyde Byrde
— Peggy
George Ede
— Blocker
Seth Green
— Danny
Beth Holland
— Shirley
Gary Klar
— Zack
Lucy Landau
— Aunt Lucy
Gina Martin
— Melissa
Antonia Rey
— Mrs. Diaz
Bob Elliott
— The Vendor
David Letterman
— Self
Joseph Amodei
— Owen
Chuck Cooper
— Cop
Drummond Erskine
— Abe Lincoln
Jerome Grabarnick
— Cop