Robbie Coltrane
— Francis Forbes Clunie
Fiona Fullerton
— Dr. Olive Branch
Jean Anderson
— Mrs Napier
Craig Ferguson
— Det. Sgt. Ure
Aine O'Connor
— Lauren McCall
Midge Ure
— Gus McCurdie
Ron Donachie
— Davie
Jimmie MacGregor
— Hughie
Natasha Gerson
— Nurse Josephine
Eilidh Fraser
— Nurse Betty
Alec Heggie
— McTaggart
Bill Murdoch
— Bald Santa
Jake D'Arcy
— Drunken Bum
Terry Neason
— Krankie Woman
Sheila Duffy
— Newscaster
Fenella Kerr
— Reporter
Moss Heights
— Poor Joe Pavarotti
Andrew Dallmeyer
— Van Centre Manager
Ken Manners
— Van Washer
Jim Boyce
— Dougie
Allan Sharpe
— Rab
Michelle Esclapez
— Mr McCurdie's PA
Harry Glass
— Newsvendor
Rab Handleigh
— Taxi Driver
Seamus Gubbins
— Bar Manager
Garry Stewart
— Bartender
Ron Paterson
— MC
Freddie Boardley
— Tam Burlaine
Allan Ross
— Archie
Iain McColl
— Marksman